Celebritweets

By Klea Kalia

Sometimes, celebrities just really suck at Twitter. And other times, they kill the tweet game. Keep reading to see what we mean.

Cher The hilarity of Cher’s tweets lies in her indiscriminate use of caps lock, unrestrained emoji usage, and the fact that a lot of them seem to make absolutely zero sense. However, her Twitter is rife with political and social commentary; if you’ve ever wanted to know Cher’s opinions on Donald Trump, Barack Obama, and ISIS, her tweets talk about them, among many, many other things. Plus, the shoutouts to her “chickadees" make you feel you’re part of something much greater than yourself.

#JebBush Is More Limp Than Cooked Spaghetti.Not Meant 2B mean As You Might Think.HES A SAD SACK.HE LOOKS MISERABLE EVERY TIME I SEE HIM

— Cher (@cher) September 16, 2015

I feel like sending everyone

— Cher (@cher) August 21, 2015

Taking BreakBeen At Project 4 hrs‼️Sometimes I Get Tired, Discouraged,Think About Chucking it,but Cant’t Give UpWanted u 2 Know I Falter

— Cher (@cher) August 9, 2015

Martha Stewart Barnard alum Martha Stewart’s Twitter may just be the strangest but most hilarious thing on the planet. If you happen to be a die-hard Stewart fan, you’re in luck, because the painfully detailed captions on each photo she uploads let you know exactly where she is, what she is doing, who she is doing it with, and, sometimes, what she is wearing while doing it. If you don’t stay for her grandma-on-Facebook style tweets, stay for her inspiring disregard for the use of periods.

Have you seen the squirrel at the U.S. open?? Watch video on marthastewart Instagram

— Martha Stewart (@MarthaStewart) September 2, 2015

We are at dinner discussing garden challenges . Do you have a good way for dealing with chipmunks? — Martha Stewart (@MarthaStewart) June 27, 2015

Jenny Slate It is not long before you find a tweet by comedian/actress (and Columbia alum) Jenny Slate that so accurately describes your life that it makes you feel a little less alone in the world for whatever weird thing you do. Her tweets are just the right mix of emotional, shameless, and relatable. Whether she’s deciding whether to wear a bra to an open house or experiencing various types of wardrobe malfunctions, Jenny reminds us that celebrities are truly just like us.

I've gotten to this place: if yr text or email doesn't have a million !!! I think ur really deeply angry w me for a mystery/shameful reason

— jenny slate (@jennyslate) September 16, 2015

 

Well i just sweated through a tiny crop top sweater shirt like it was my fucking job. — jenny slate (@jennyslate) September 9, 2015

Keough Novak Keough Novak is The Office writer B.J. Novak’s fictional portrayal of his 16-year-old sister. If it sounds absurd, that’s because it is. Her superficial, distinctly millennial personality is clear even from her bio, which includes the phrases, “Keep Adderall Legal,” and “Lana del Rye.” Her gripes about Snapchat and clever pop culture commentary make you forget that she’s a fake teenager whose thoughts are actually those of a 36-year-old guy who never even had a sister.

Real talk are these musicians in the black and white Apple Music ads or like rejected Levi's models — Keough Novak (@KeoNovak) August 12, 2015

Check your phone so I can check my phone — Keough Novak (@KeoNovak) April 22, 2015

Rainn Wilson If you’re looking to hear more from Rainn Wilson’s character from The Office, Dwight Schrute, his Twitter is probably not the place to go. But Rainn Wilson—the person—has a Twitter full of funny, clever quips and comments on society ranging from pronouncing the word “niche” to the level of happiness in clams. The twists he puts on the strange and interesting observations he makes will really make you think and look at things in a different light.

"I should have checked my phone more!" -everyone, while on their deathbed

— RainnWilson (@rainnwilson) August 10, 2015

“In 2040 Kanye West was elected President for an unprecedented 5th term. The Browns repeated as SuperBowl Champions.” #FutureHistoryBook — RainnWilson (@rainnwilson) September 10, 2015